Las citas en línea son buenas para los hombres, pero no tanto para las mujeres – El Mostrador

Básicamente, las necesidades de las personas que buscan pareja en línea están más cubiertas para los hombres que para las mujeres, lo cual juega a favor de ellos. Para nosotras, es más difícil usar esas habilidades evolutivas a través de una app que para ellos.

Fuente: Las citas en línea son buenas para los hombres, pero no tanto para las mujeres – El Mostrador


A normalization of violence: how cyberbullying began and how to fight it | Life and style | The Guardian

Everyday on the internet, people – disproportionately women, people of color and queer people – are abused. How did we get here and what can we do about it?

Fuente: A normalization of violence: how cyberbullying began and how to fight it | Life and style | The Guardian


Sexual harassment in virtual reality feels all too real – ‘it’s creepy beyond creepy’ | Technology | The Guardian

Sexual harassment has been a feature of online and gaming communities from the earliest days of the internet. Until now, the abuse has been largely limited to verbal and visual messages, but as virtual reality technology becomes more immersive, the line between our real bodies and our digital bodies begins to blur.

Fuente: Sexual harassment in virtual reality feels all too real – ‘it’s creepy beyond creepy’ | Technology | The Guardian


Porn as sex education: a cultural influence we can no longer ignore | Maree Crabbe | Opinion | The Guardian

Not only does pornography commonly portray a particularly concentrated and toxic version of gender inequality, it suggests that it is sexy

Fuente: Porn as sex education: a cultural influence we can no longer ignore | Maree Crabbe | Opinion | The Guardian


For a 50-year-old woman, being yourself online is a no-no | Life and style | The Guardian

For a 50-year-old woman, being yourself online is a no-no | Life and style | The Guardian.

For any chance of success, you need to be skinny, Pilates-practising, scuba-diving – and a fan of The Fast Show
Scuba diving
Scuba diving – the mature woman’s route to a man’s heart? (Posed by models) Photograph: Alamy

For a while, my dating site profile said that the end of my relationship wasn’t my idea. I thought people would find it reassuring that I’m not a dumper, but – if you like – a dumpee. What I found was that most men didn’t find it reassuring at all. It seemed to trigger something – curiosity and then judgment. “What did you do to get dumped? Are you a bitch?” I mentioned this in an online chat one evening with a man called Neville, and asked what he thought.

“You may as well give up now,” he wrote, ignoring the question, “and withdraw from here and save your money.” I asked him what he meant.

“It’s porn that’s your problem,” he said. “Now that porn is normal, now that it’s normal to look at porn online, that’s the downfall of the middle-aged woman.

“Men are convinced that if they become bachelors again, that’s the kind of sex life they’ll get. Young women, big tits, flat stomachs, a tight fit where it matters. There are loads of gorgeous young things here who’d be happy with a 50-year-old sugar daddy. You can’t compete with that.”

Not having seen profiles written by other 50-year-old women, it was hard to know what the norm was, and how far I deviated from the average. I mentioned this to my friend Jack. Together we went in to my page with rolled-up sleeves and blitzed every one of the errors he identified – being whiney, being needy, being pompous and self-aggrandising (that hurt), overly-conventional (Radio 4 was tussled over; I won), and too bookish. The argument that it was best to be myself cut little ice. Despite his efforts, despite adding baking, London parks, gigs and beer to the list of things I like, I was still, Jack complained, all too evidently an alpha control freak and raging intellectual snob. That was limiting the response types. It was putting people off.

It is important online not to be seen to take yourself too seriously. Men engaged in online dating constantly say how unseriously they take life, as if that’s a good thing. I find it a complete turn-off, but then it is evident that I have way too many opinions. I am persisting with the accurate, off-putting version of myself.


If tech companies wanted to end online harassment, they could do it tomorrow | Jessica Valenti | Comment is free | theguardian.com

If tech companies wanted to end online harassment, they could do it tomorrow | Jessica Valenti | Comment is free | theguardian.com.

The courts may decide that sending threats over social media isn’t threatening enough to be a crime. Silicon Valley needs to step up or lose customers

woman computer concerned
When online harassment is routine, being online might become less of a part of women’s routine. Photograph: Alamy

If someone posted a death threat to your Facebook page, you’d likely be afraid. If the person posting was your husband – a man you had a restraining order against, a man who wrote that he was “not going to rest until [your] body [was] a mess, soaked in blood and dying from all the little cuts” – then you’d be terrified. It’s hard to imagine any other reasonable reaction.

Yet that’s just what Anthony Elonis wants you to believe: That his violent Facebook posts – including one about masturbating on his dead wife’s body – were not meant as threats. So on Monday, in Elonis v United States, the US supreme court will start to hear arguments in a case that will determine whether threats on social media will be considered protected speech.

If the court rules for Elonis, those who are harassed and threatened online every day – women, people of color, rape victims and young bullied teens– will have even less protection than they do now. Which is to say: not damn much.

For as long as people – women, especially – have been on the receiving end of online harassment, they’ve been strategizing mundane and occasionally creative ways to deal with it. Some call law enforcementwhen the threats are specific. Others mock the harassment – or, in the case of videogame reviewer and student Alanah Pearce, send a screenshot to the harasser’s mother.

But the responsibility of dealing with online threats shouldn’t fall on the shoulders of the people who are being harassed. And it shouldn’t need to rise to being a question of constitutional law. If Twitter, Facebook or Google wanted to stop their users from receiving online harassment, they could do it tomorrow.

When money is on the line, internet companies somehow magically find ways to remove content and block repeat offenders. For instance, YouTube already runs a sophisticated Content ID program dedicated to scanning uploaded videos for copyrighted material and taking them down quickly – just try to bootleg music videos or watch unofficial versions of Daily Show clips and see how quickly they get taken down. But a look at the comments under any video and it’s clear there’s no real screening system for even the most abusive language.

If these companies are so willing to protect intellectual property, why not protect the people using your services?


I can't leave the internet to avoid trolls. But I don't have to carry it with me | Jessica Valenti | Comment is free | theguardian.com

I can’t leave the internet to avoid trolls. But I don’t have to carry it with me | Jessica Valenti | Comment is free | theguardian.com.

Call it a social media stay-cation: I’m not shutting down my Twitter account, but I’m uninstalling the app

 

 

woman man mobile
This is what some people call “a date”. Photograph: Tetra Images / Corbis

 

There are plenty of studies and books pointing out the many ways technology is damaging the way we live our lives. We’re less connected to our kids, we’re attached to our screens, we’re burned out. Every year around this time you read another treatise about someone who has taken a long hiatus from the internet just to get some peace, quiet and perspective. I’m not quite ready for anything that serious – and hey, I work on the internet – but I am desperate for a change.

Writing on predominantly feminist issues brings out a certain … element, shall we say, in comments, emails, and on social media. And as resistant as I’ve become over the last 10 years by doing this kind of writing and public work, there’s a toll that comes with being told daily that you’re a slut, or a bitch, or that you should be raped all because you had the temerity to have an opinion and a vagina at the same time.

But taking my ball and going home isn’t an option – after all, this is my game, too. This is where I work and socialize, communicate with friends and colleagues. Why should I have to leave if I’m not the one behaving badly? Then last week, I came up with a more moderate solution than swearing off technology and comments sections: I took the Twitter and Facebook apps off my phone. It was glorious.

I know – hardly a huge sacrifice. But I’ve been shocked at how much of a difference it’s already made. I’m no longer “just checking” to see what people are talking about, only to come across some random person telling me he’d like to be my tampon for a day. (Yes, that is a real thing that happened.)

Since paring down my social media use, I’ve also become less likely to get drawn in to a conversation when I should be eating dinner with my family, or tweeting when I should be relaxing before bed. (There’s nothing worse for an insomniac than a flashing screen in your face, minutes before you try to get some shut-eye.) Less crap on my phone means more time for everything else.


From teledildonics to interactive porn: the future of sex in a digital age | Life and style | The Guardian

From teledildonics to interactive porn: the future of sex in a digital age | Life and style | The Guardian.

Click to watch our interactive film about the seven digital deadly sins
A neon lips sign

‘I’ve yet to meet a person who can vibrate at 120hz. And there’s something to be said for that, you know? Technology will offer a level of pleasure that is higher than the real thing.’ Photograph: Sara Morris for the Guardian

When 35-year-old Jane first signed up to the dating website she has used for about a year, she says it was “quite overwhelming”. “I was inundated with winks, and messages, people trying to chat with me live online, all sorts. Some will send you detailed pictures of their penis, basically. What the hell? You’ve got a penis. Congratulations.”

In due course, Jane found ways of negotiating the sexual barrage, and went on to meet 20 or more men; about three-quarters of those have turned into some sort of romantic or physical relationship. “They’ve all been mini-relationships. I’ve never had a one-night stand.”

Online dating is not an unusual story, but Jane has been married for seven years. The site she uses is Ashley Madison, one of a growing number that caters to men and women seeking extra-marital affairs. Deeply unhappy in her marriage to a husband who “shows no interest in me sexually”, she says Ashley Madison turned her life round. “I don’t take antidepressants any more. And I can sleep properly. Mentally and physically, it has changed things. I’m getting on better with my husband.”

She never thought of herself as a potential adulterer. “My dad cheated on my mum years ago, and I didn’t speak to him for years after that. I was horrified. I thought it was the most immoral thing. But now I’m doing it, I’m seeing it from a different angle.” While surface social mores haven’t changed much in recent years – politicians still play on family values, and Ashley Madison is still banned from advertising on British television – in the private spaces of the web, things are moving fast.


Candy Crush, la confitería virtual que atrae más a las mujeres – BioBioChile

Candy Crush, la confitería virtual que atrae más a las mujeres – BioBioChile.


Candy Crush Saga | King

Candy Crush Saga | King

Publicado por Denisse Charpentier | La Información es de Agencia AFP
Con tres niños pequeños y un empleo, Emma Martini tiene poco tiempo para los juegos de computador. Pero cada noche se sienta en silencio al pie de la cama de su hijo mientras éste se duerme… y juega a Candy Crush.

“¡Me evita estar ahí sentada en la oscuridad mirando a la pared durante 15 minutos!”, dice riendo a la AFP esta madre de 32 años.

Martini es una de las fans de este adictivo juego, a quienes se puede ver concentrados en sus teléfonos y tabletas en cuanto tienen un segundo.

A diferencia de los videojuegos convencionales, cuyas partidas pueden durar horas, Candy Crush Saga es uno de los nuevos “juegos informales” que se disfrutan en momentos cortos y mientras se viaja.

El pasatiempo se ha colado en cada momento del día, atrayendo a gente nueva al universo de los videojuegos; y las mujeres constituyen dos tercios de los apasionados de Candy Crush, según la empresa creadora, King.

“No sé mucho de ordenadores y tiendo a dedicar el poco tiempo que me queda a leer un libro”, explicó Martini, una profesora asistente de Spilsby, en el este de Inglaterra.

Pero su madre, de 52 años, la convenció de descargar Candy Crush. “Me estaba volviendo loca” con las solicitudes para sumarse al juego a través de Facebook.

Ahora Martini juega cada noche mientras su hijo cae dormido: “Lleno un tiempo vacío”, comenta.

“Los juegos informales han calado entre las mujeres”, explicó Mark Griffiths, director del departamento de investigación de juegos de la universidad Nottingham Trent.

“La mayoría de las veces juegan cuando el niño hace una siesta, o camino al trabajo, sin interferir en las cosas importantes de la vida”.

“Es una solución rápida al aburrimiento”, sentencia.

“No dejaría de jugar un segundo con mis hijos para pasar un nivel”, confirma Nuria López, una madre de dos niños barcelonesa que comparte afición al juego con su hija Paula, de 12 años.

“Las partidas son cortas y te quedas rápidamente sin vidas. Eso ayuda a no engancharse”, argumenta.